I just found out last night that my cousin Van passed away on Monday. I am sad about it of course, he was only 46, just 12 years older than me but as a young kid I idolized him.  We talked about rebooting this last week and Van was someone who really couldn't do it, you could offer your whole self to him, all the help in the World and he just couldn't grasp it.  We lost a truly sweet person though, he would never hurt anyone, always kind and happy to see family and friends and help out when needed.  He only hurt himself, he didn't take care of himself, he never thought highly of himself and that hurts all of us, his family.  His Mom abused him from a baby to an adult and he just shut down. She was cruel to him and then after his Dad died it was worse.  So it is no wonder he didn't take care of himself, she broke him and it was/is a shame.  He was doing ok, he had a little house in the Bayou and a boat and loved to do his fishing but Hurricane Katrina wiped out the entire town of Waveland, Mississippi and he just never got back on his feet after that. I saw him in January of this year and I could barely look at him, he wasn't the Van I grew up knowing. I walked away feeling really sad and wanting to find him help. I tried, we all tried he just wouldn't take it and now he is gone.  He is probably much happier now up in heaven we are all just left here wonder what could have been if only, if only he would have rebooted.

 Monica